Sharpening a Thesis Statement

Once you have formulated what you think is a sound thesis statement, examine it carefully. Does it clearly indicate the main point of your paper? Does it offer a conclusion of sorts? Can you be more argumentative or more specific?

Here is a list of questions with which to interrogate your essay’s thesis statement:

• How?
• In what way?
• To what extent?
• Why? (“because . . . )
• So what?

If your thesis statement leaves one or more of these related questions unanswered, then you likely need to focus or sharpen it further. Take, for instance, the following thesis that a DCS student on a tour of duty has devised for an essay she is working on:

Thesis #1: The internet is a useful tool for distance education students.

The problem with this thesis is that it leaves the reader wondering how or in what way the writer thinks the internet can be a “useful tool” for distance learning. The thesis is not specific enough. Responding to the thesis sharpening questions above, the student revises the thesis statement:

Thesis #2: The internet enables distance education students to research a topic easily and effectively.

This thesis statement is stronger than the first because it explains what is meant by the phrase “useful tool.” But it still leaves a fundamental question unanswered: Why? As the student researches what is available on various internet sites related to subject matter she is studying, she discovers a point of focus for her argument:

Thesis #3: Because up-to-date data and information on a range of topics and from credible sources is readily available online, the internet is an invaluable research tool for the distance education student.

The opening “Because . . .” statement gets at the reason behind the argument. Having this element in the thesis statement makes it even stronger, just as adding a reason to the statement of your controlling idea results in something of significance to write about.